ironangel: (Default)
well, some.

I should write more. I feel better when I do. So here, my friends (ok, let's be honest, no one needs to read this for me to get anything out of it, but I like to pretend I have an audience!), is a little brain dump.

What's happened to me? That's a hard question, and it needs scope.

I grew up. I went to college. I took time off. I got married. I got diagnosed with ADHD. I got divorced. I moved back to PA. I was asleep for a while, and then I woke up. I took a huge chance and moved to TX, and it was worth it. I moved to CA. I moved back to TX. I got married.

Now? Now I'm trying to sort things out. Do I want kids? Yes, and no. Part of me is selfish, but part of me thinks the smart people need to procreate, and we're pretty smart. What do I want to be when I grow up? Project Manager, I think. Just enough technical knowledge, really good at keeping schedules and herding cats.

I love my house, and my yard, and my dog and cats, and my husband. I'm more of a hermit than I used to be, but that's ok. I'd say I'm more conservative, except that I think I'm just more honest with myself about it.

I like making things. That applies to crafts and woodwork, furniture and decorations. I've usually got something in the works at any given point. As I get older, I work on finishing them more often than I used to; I have so many things half-done.

I'm backing off of my strattera, as it seems to be at least in part causing some of my anxiety. Oh, anxiety - you've been around so long, I didn't know you weren't just part of me. Let's try and sort you out, shall we? Was it ADHD I had, or just stress from my marital issues?

One of the best things about my husband is that he encourages me to take time, check things out, and see if I can get by unmedicated, or at least *less* medicated. I'd like to make music again, and my creativity has suffered greatly on medication.

The future is unwritten, but I'm kind of excited.

Date: 2012-08-17 08:50 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] wednesday
wednesday: (Default)
I found that backing down on my dosage by about a third made a huge difference in my anxiety levels without too much of an impact on focus.

Date: 2012-08-17 09:08 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] rani23.livejournal.com
Lovely to see you writing. :)

Date: 2012-08-17 09:51 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] cellio
cellio: (Default)
Welcome back!

Date: 2012-08-17 11:02 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] zellandyne.livejournal.com
That would be great if you could lower the strattera. Sounds like you're going to be doing some exciting stuff :)

Date: 2012-08-18 02:56 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] indigodove.livejournal.com
Glad to hear things are going well.

Date: 2012-08-18 05:41 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] eub.livejournal.com
Good to see you back here. Yay for self-exploration.

You didn't ask for comment on thinking about kids, but I have some available.

Date: 2012-08-19 01:26 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] blk
blk: (baby)
You have comments or kids available? Dude, you shouldn't be giving them away YET.

Date: 2012-08-19 05:17 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] eub.livejournal.com
They only get harder and harder to give away as they get older.

Date: 2012-08-20 07:06 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] sinthrex.livejournal.com
Really? I might be willing if there were lease options for like between 4 and 10 or so. After that they'd have to take them back. No diapers, no teenagers. ^_^

Date: 2012-08-20 02:59 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] chrisamaphone
i keep seeing you pop up on posts of various people i follow and it seems increasingly strange that i don't know you. when did you finish at CMU?

Date: 2012-08-20 05:58 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] eub.livejournal.com
I was there 1995 - 2002, in CSD. How about you?

Date: 2012-08-20 06:54 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] chrisamaphone
That explains it - I started undergrad in 04, grad school in 08. Still there.

Date: 2012-08-21 01:00 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] blk
blk: (sister)
(For further small-worldness, he's also married to my sister, who never went to CMU) :)

Date: 2012-08-18 07:18 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] strixluna.livejournal.com
I glad to see you again!

Date: 2012-08-18 08:53 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] zare-k.livejournal.com
Nice to see you again. I think I know what you mean about being asleep for a while and then waking up.

Date: 2012-08-19 01:27 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] blk
blk: (Default)
Hi! :)

Date: 2012-08-20 03:02 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] chrisamaphone
thanks for posting this. and hi. :)

Date: 2012-08-25 10:46 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] retch.livejournal.com
I'm glad in general things are progressing well for you! :) HUG!
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